Don’t let the media warp your perception of beauty. Beauty is pizza.
my friend left her window open in her bedroom and came back to find this
look at his self-satisfied little face, the cheeky shit
if there was a post to describe australia, this is it
you mean to tell me this isn’t even a pet bird?
that in australia, you have wild birds that just fly from house to house with the express purpose of fucking shit up?
fucking HELL australia, what is wrong with you?
wake up australia
That’s what birds do
They fly around and fuck shit up
Do you have some kind of mysterious nice birds in your weird foreign country
Do birds in America and England fly into your house and make the bed and tidy up the living room a little bit
It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel.
Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do
yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes
why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal.
My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us.
no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange
what the actual fuck australia
Powerpuff Girls was actually a show about a group of small children crushing the patriarchy and no one will convince me otherwise
Anyone who tries to convince you otherwise obviously wasn’t watching the same show.
Can somebody add more to this post?
[walks around with an entire big mac in my mouth but never actually biting down] It’s a metaphor, see: you put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the power to do its killing.
you took this from a fault in our stars augustus does the same thing only with a cigarette ok ok
i don’t know what you’re talking about this is an excerpt from my upcoming 100% original novel “the fart in our stalls”
when straight guys ask how lesbian sex works i feel really bad for their girlfriends because if you dont understand how to have sex with a girl in any way other than repeatedly putting your dick in her you are having some really bad sex
I want to reblog this 100 times but I’ll just do it once
this is gold
- Ancient Egypt was not a mixed society.
- Ancient Egypt was PITCHED BLACK until the 7th century AD, when Indo Aryans called Arabs invaded from Central Asia.
- For 99 percent of Egyptian history, Egypt was as BLACK as Nigeria, as BLACK as Congo, and as BLACK as Senegal.
- King Tut was a dark skinned black man,
- Queen Tiye was a beautiful and EXTREMELY dark skinned woman.
- Hatshepsut was also very very very dark skinned.
- Even during the Ptolemaic period of Kemet, the Egyptians were primarily African.
- The fact that the most advanced civilization of human history was composed primarily of Black People is the most annoying and frustrating thing to white supremacist historians today.